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| Young jenny from the block! lol (Mission: Get back to this size) 12th grade I think! |
Hi Luxe Ladies! So a few months ago while sitting under the
dryer and visiting some of my favorite plus size blogs, I began to reminisce
about my high school days. To me, it wasn’t anything spectacular about high
school (well maybe prom, graduation, and being an senior superlative). Probably
because I was known as the smart, quiet, and cute but fat black girl with long
hair! However, one thing that I really enjoyed was my personal style. I would
wear heels at least 3 times a week and rock makeup like no tomorrow (only eyes
makeup and lip gloss.... no foundation for me!). I even filled in my eyebrows
and got ridiculed for them being too long!!! HAHA.
Anyway, my clothes weren’t name brand, but I
enjoyed them still the same because it was how I expressed myself. I was very
much confident and happy with whom I was. Then I entered college. It seemed to be the
prospect of achieving greatness and partaking in every event possible, only to
witness the dreaded fact that my plans were not reality. So I asked myself, “Is
it really happiness I’m missing, or joy?” Only then did I realize that
happiness is a temporary solution to the lack of joy in my life. Happiness
equated to the gain of material things; all of which would eventually be lost.
However, in the midst of searching for happiness, I found joy in writing and in
being me. I decided to go back to those joyful days of high school and relive
them now with more edge, voice, courage and most important confidence.
The purpose of this VENT was to express to all that despite
life circumstances, you have to find joy in the self and serving God. If we are
constantly searching for others to make us happy, then life will pass by and
all we will have is a lot of bitterness towards people and self-hate. At the
end of the day, look for peace within yourself. To be continued…
